I apologize for the late hour. I went to see The Hunger Games tonight. It was good. Not as good as the book, but still good.
Anyway, here we are. Jennifer Lopez got in a fight with a pair of scissors, judging by the top half of her dress.
Nicki Minaj and Scotty McReery are on the show. YES! I absolutely cannot wait!!!!!!
Steven Tyler and Aerosmith are going to go on tour. They'll probably have their shows at 2 in the afternoon so they can make sure they get to bed by 7. Because they're old. Seriously, though, that's too much activity for those guys. One of them is going to keel over.
Eric Benet came to tell DeAndre he is terrible and needs to go home immediately. Oh, wait, no that's not what he said. Well, but really, should we actually listen to anything Eric Benet says? I mean the man was in "Glitter" with Mariah Carey, for cryin' out loud.
Ford Music Video. 80's rock and retro TV sets.
The contestants moved into the mansion. DeAndre didn't know what the bidet is for. I don't have an appropriate comment for that.
Elise, Hollie, Phillip are up. Hollie should be in the bottom three.
Jimmy says Elise did herself and American Idol a lot of good. He also says next week is 80's week. And to that I say, WHY?
Jimmy says Phillip can go all the way, and he says that because Stevie Nicks only likes great singers. A-Greed.
Jimmy says Hollie has a beautiful sound and did a beautiful job, but she's emotionally not good. He also thinks Jessica is better than Hollie when it comes to her soul. Uh...Okay.
Hollie is in the bottom three. Called. It.
Phillip is safe. Called. It.
Elise is safe. Called. It. Again. I'm 100% accurate so far.
Nicki Minaj is sing....oh no, that's right Nicki Minaj doesn't sing, she yells. And THAT, ladies and gentlemen is all that is wrong with music. Paul: "She has no talent. 'Cause they don't have talent. And she sounds like a flying dead squirrel."
Colton, Heejun, and Joshua are up. Heejun should be in the bottom three. Paul: "Colton, Joshua, and Heejun....Joshua you are safe. Heejun, you are in the bottom three. Colton....Jesus called and He said you're going to hell." That was wildly inappropriate. But also caused me to laugh with no sound.
Jimmy says Colton is good, but not good enough. Jimmy says he has to be good in all 4 phases. And he thinks Colton lost.
Jimmy says Joshua has so much talent and he delivered 85% of the song, but then he cried like a pansy and his throat closed. But he liked the Michael Jackson medley. I think Joshua's emotionality is awesome. And according to my spell-checker, emotionality is not a word. Or at least it's not a correctly spelled word.
Jimmy says Heejun doesn't sing as well as the other contestants in the show.
Colton is safe. Called. It.
Joshua is safe. Called. It. But Ryan tried to trick me. But Ryan is not tricky.
Heejun is in the bottom three. Called. It. Again. 100% still. Please let this streak continue....
Scotty McReery is next!!!!!!! OMGEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
Scotty!!!!!!!! Yup, he's still got the GW Bush face down. That's enough.
Well, shut MY mouth....Scotty has sold 1,000,000 albums. Those teenage girls sure do buy a lot of music.
Skylar, DeAndre, and Jessica are up. DeAndre should be in the bottom three.
Jimmy says Skylar needs to go to songs that are more melodic and not just lyrical songs.
Jimmy says DeAndre is right in the middle. He also says DeAndre has to work for a spot in American Idol and not everyone will buy into his falsetto. I think I would be evidence enough of that.
Jimmy says Jessica has harnessed experience like she has been singing for 20 years. He also makes the very astute observation that young girls tend to vote for young guys. I have been saying that for years.
Jessica is safe. Called. It.
DeAndre is safe. BLERGITYBLERGITYBLERGITYBLERGITY.
Skylar is in the bottom three for no good reason whatsoever.
With this ridiculous turn of events, I say Heejun is going home.
Skylar is safe. Thank Heavens.
Heejun is "at risk." He has to sing for his life. They will not save him.
DeAndre should have DEFINITELY been in the bottom three. That's completely ridiculous.
Oh no. They might save him. Nope. Ok then.
So that's done.
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