Wednesday, February 29, 2012

It's Ladies Night

Ladies night inevitably means poo squattage, sashaying, and probably a lot of ? as to why they made it to the live shows in the first place.

Ryan wants to know if one of these ladies will be the first female winner in 5 seasons. Brielle thinks that by raising one eyebrow and looking "shexy" (shady/sexy) she is stating that she will be the first female winner in 5 seasons. I say notinamillionyears.

Steven Tyler was getting one last sip backstage and was a little tardy for the party this evening.

Tomorrow night we'll narrow down to 10 and each judge will have a wild card pick. Which means Nigel will tell them which 3 that are "eliminated" shouldn't have been "eliminated" and force the judges to pick them.

Chelsea is first. She is from the country. I like her. She is singing "Cowboy Casanova" by Ms. Underwood. Wow. That's gutsy. That was actually really good. Enjoyable. She seemed to lose a little steam towards the end, but it was pretty good overall. Randy Yo Dawg: "Kickin' it off with a big Carrie Underwood, you can definitely sing, but I don't know if it was the best song choice, we've seen the Carrie Underwood thing, it'd be like if somebody got up there and tried to sing Steven Tyler." Me: "Huh? Last night, practically everyone did a copycat performance of someone else's song and you were falling over yourselves worshipping the very ground they stood on." Jenny from the Block: "Your voice sounded nasally and people didn't get to hear the best part of you. It sucks to go first." Steven Tyler: "I can hear your heart pounding from here. Watch your phrasing." Me: "Either I no longer have good taste in music or I need to get my ears checked." Namedrop: 1

Erika Van Pelt is up next. She lives in Rhode Island. She's a mobile DJ. That would be a fun job. I like her personality. I think she's fun. She's singing "What About Love?" She has a really powerful voice. You know how I said I thought the odds were against a female winning this year? The girls are straight showing up tonight. I may have been wrong. Steven Tyler: "I loved your confidence, I loved the notes, it's beautiful." Jenny from the Block: "You could have pushed it a little more. Next time, let loose, let loose on us. But you're amazing." Randy Yo Dawg: "Well, yo. You showed this confidence, this restraint, kind of an Adele vibe. I was thinking, yo, if this girl DJ's as good as she sings, yo, a singing DJ!" Ryan: "Were you holding back a little bit?" Erika: "Maybe a little melodically, but I wanted to show my rock side."
Me: "I dug it." Namedrop total: 2

Jen Hirsch is from Agoura Hills. She has a cute dog and a cute family. She is singing Adele's "One and Only." I've never heard this song. I like Jen Hirsch alot. She has a raelly amazing control to her voice. I liked this performance. Not as much as Erika but more than Chelsea. Jenny from the Block: "I felt the feeling in the song. Really good job." Steven Tyler: "Confidence makes a voice fly and yours was soaring." Randy Yo Dawg: "I love you and your voice, you can do those runs, you can naturally go there." She was good.

Brielle. My favorite. NO. Her Mom is living with the contestants. That's probably LOADS of fun. She's singing "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay." Correction. She's growling it. And now she's shouting it. The NY accent on this song was so irritating. Not to mention the fact that she tie-dyed her dress in arts and crafts class. Steven Tyler: "You have a sense of the blues. Nice, nice, nice." Jenny from the Block: "This is what I love about you, people don't think about you as one of the big voices. But you're a performer." Randy Yo Dawg: "You can really sing. You surprised me. Like a little Janis Joplin." Namedrop total: 3 She drives me insane.

Hallie Day is up. She lives in Baltimore, MD. She is strange. I don't know why I think that but I do. She's singing "Feelin' Good." That was a pretty decent performance. She has good stage presence. Her voice was shaky in spots but overall it was pretty good. Jenny from the Block: "It had some really beautiful moments. You looked like a star." Steven Tyler: "Since day one you know how I feel. I think your voice is old-timey, like Adele. It's great." Me: "Not everyone can be Adele. In fact, no one IS Adele except Adele. What you're trying to say is, they have talent. Which is rare." Randy Yo Dawg: "What do you want to do?" Hallie: "I just want to put soul into everything I do." Randy Yo Dawg: "I just didn't know where you would be. (unintelligible name) is doing that, Adele is doing it, but I didn't know how you would fit." Namedrop total: 5

Skylar is up next. Skylar lives in a small town. Skylar is the one that I said I thought might win at her audition. Not Bailey. Skylar. I like her a lot. I love the country twang. She really does remind me of Reba. I love her. I'm Team Skylar all the way. Randy Yo Dawg: "You are like the rockin' country chick. You're like a mix of Reba, Kelly Clarkson and Tina Turner. I recorded that song with Travis Tritt." Namedrop total: 9. Jenny from the Block: "I love your twang. You're a natural born performer." Steven Tyler: "You made Galveston proud. You're a pistol. Keep it up." Awkward pause while cameraman waits for Steven to keep talking.

Baylie Brown is up next. She lives in TX. She lives with her GrandDad. Awww. Landry has a GrandDad too! She's singing "Amazed." She's kind of falling apart. She's about 1/2 a beat behind the band. She's flat in spots and sharp in others. And she's being overpowered by the background singers at the key change. She's also peaking her voice on the high end of her range. That was disappointing. And surprising. I expected her to do better. Steven Tyler: "I don't know if that was the best song you could have picked. But I enjoyed it. You're very pretty." Jenny from the Block: "It was a little shaky all the way through. You didn't have total control." Me: "Finally, we agree!" Randy Yo Dawg: "I agree. You never seized control. It was good. You look amazing. But I don't think it was great." Baylie had fun, bless her little country heart.

Hollie Cavanagh has a strange accent. Or perhaps a speech impediment? I don't know. She's singing "Reflection" which is a song from "Mulan," the Disney movie. I give this performance a big ol' ???????? She looks like she's very confused and scared and oh my goodness that big note was SHARP! Steven Tyler: "One of my favorites from the start you hit your notes perfect." Me: "She did?????" Jenny from the Block: "I think you can win this. I know you didn't have everything you wanted in that song." Me: "She can win this????" Randy Yo Dawg: "You're one of my favorites. I love your vocals. It'd be nice to see you let go a little bit." Me: "I just don't get it. She's cute and everything, but I don't find her voice all that fabulous."

Haley Johnson is from Oregon. She's singing "Sweet Dreams" and she has a strange dress. Also, her voice is odd. It's pleasant, but odd. It's plodd. Jenny from the Block: "I hope America heard all of the intricacies that you did." Steven Tyler: "Some of your turn arounds weren't perfect, but what in life is? You pulled it through. The money shots were spot on." Randy Yo Dawg: "It was a bit of a nightmare more than a dream. Annie Lennox. I'm dizzy." Namedrop total: 10

Shannon's Dad is here and he's going to beat up Steven. Not really. She is singing "Go Light Your World" by Kathy Troccoli. This is a Christian song. Wow! That was really good. But I'm very sleepy. So this is going to have to wait.

Well that's frustrating. I had the whole thing completed and it didn't save. Stupid technology.

Anyway, in a nutshell. Shannon was good. Jessica Sanchez was a'ight for me for you. Elise was awesome, but I just really love her voice. This is my ideal top 13.

Phillip Phillips
Reed Grimm
Joshua Ledet
Creighton Fraker
Elise Testone
Jen Hirsh
Skylar Laine
Shannon Magrane
Erika Van Pelt

Wild Cards: Jeremy Rosado, Adam Brock, and Jessica Sanchez.

We'll see, America. We'll see.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

ANNNNNNND....We're Live!

Live show! Live show! Live show!

Seriously, Ryan Seacrest stole this guy's hair. By the way, that guy is my brother. He's a broadcaster. Someone should hire him.

American Idol has a new home. It's a fancy arena thing complete with cheesy game show music.

The guys are up tonight. The girls are up tomorrow. Thursday we get down to the top 13.

Randy Jackson has KILLER lapels. Jenny from the Block has pretty hair. Steven Tyler killed a zebra for his jacket.

Here are the Top 12 guys. Reed, Adam, DeAndre, Colton, Jeremy, Aaron, Chase, Philip, Jebeneiber, Heejun, and Joshua. They refuse to tell us who the 13th person will be. Gah!

Reed is up first. He is from Wisconsin. He apparently cares for his nieces. That's nice. Reed will be singing "Moves Like Jagger" which is probably one of the dumbest songs ever. Sorry Adam Levine. I will say I kind of enjoy this arrangement. Also, he busts out the drum kit, which is nice. Oh, he dropped his pack! But did not let it throw him or turn into a diva about it. I enjoyed that. It was probably an 8.5/10 for me for you. Randy Yo Dawg: "Yo, I'm glad we had someone like you to jump off season one one. You had some Sheila E on the timbalis and you sounded like Casey from last season." Namedrop: 2 Jenny from the Block: "Everyone is so familiar with that song, the pop version, it was good to show some variety." Steven Tyler: "I love your voice you can do anything with it." You know what I DON'T like about Reed? I don't like that he is so over the top with his facial expressions. It's unsettling.

Adam Brock is up next. He is a jack of all trades master of none. He has a large black woman trapped in his body. He should get that checked out. He is going to sing "Think." Usually a bad idea to sing a girl song....This is really copycat. It's just kind of boring for me for you. Also, he reminds me of my drama teacher my Freshman year of high school. I was not a fan. Of the drama teacher. I'm hoping Adam will stick around to the top 13, but he will need to show some originality. Steven Tyler: "I'm going to talk instead of letting Jennifer from the Block speak since I'm already wasted." Jenny from the Block: "I liked the end. It was great." Randy Yo Dawg: "I like that you have the throwback vibe. Is that a Pittsburgh Steelers towel?" Me: "Throwback vibe is just another way of saying copycat. And Steelers??? Adam is shunned. SHUN ON!"

DeAndre Makemesick is up next. His sister has his hair. When they hug it's like a crazy birds nest. Paul thinks DeAndre Makemesick looks like Michael Bolton. And he loves Michael Bolton. That was sarcasm. DeAndre Makemesick is doing exactly what I thought he would do. Making me sick. The falsetto is really annoying as is his hair flippage. Oh good, he's going to be the one that screams his way into oblivion this season. Jenny from the Block: "Do I go first? I-" Steven Tyler: (interrupting) "I told you this was going to happen if you kept singing like that. Good for you man. Good for you. It was great." Jenny from the Block: "That's right. Everything you do is magical and amazing." Randy Yo Dawg: "We've been doing this show for 11 seasons. The falsetto is amazing and THEN you do the big chest note at the end and I was like Yo, this kid's got it all." Me:"And then I was like, YO, THE JUDGES ARE LISTENING TO SOMETHING TOTALLY DIFFERENT THAN I AM!"

Colton Dixon is obsessed with his sister. It's strange. Also, he has dumb hair. He's going to shock us. He's singing a song I've never heard. In the promo package he said, "People are used to seeing me at a piano and uh, I think I'm going to shock a few people." I even went back and rewatched it, yo. And then, lo and behold, HE'S AT A PIANO! I'm shocked. Flabbergasted. Amazed, really. That was also sarcasm. They should really clean that piano. It has scuff marks and fingerprints all over it. Now he's standing up. Is that that shocking part? Now he's standing on the piano. That must be the shocking part. He keeps singing, "How did we get here?" My question? How did YOU get here? That was very emo and very Durbin-y. So I'm lovin' that. *sarcasm* Randy Yo Dawg: "You almost made it last year. I'm glad you're back. It's about time we had our own little indie-alt rocker singing Paramore. I love all the flavors." Me: "Taste the rainbow." Jenny from the Block: "I look forward to America really feeling your heart. You're a relevant artist. I hear you on the radio." Me: "He is? He sounds like everyone else." Steven Tyler: "We saw your true talent. Keep rocking it." Ryan: "Was that a risk for you?" Colton: "I'm never out from behind a piano, that's my home." Me: "Oh. Ok. Well then I guess that was shocking." Colton: "VINDICATIONNNNN!"

Jeremy Rosado is up next. I like this kid. He seems nice. He's singing a girl song, too! GAH! But at least it's Sara Bareilles. I love her. He likes to encourage others. He works at the front desk for an infectious diseases doctor's office. Gross. HA! The guy playing piano for him has the music on an iPad. That's awesome. He has a sweet tone to his voice. But he's a little flat in spots. Probably just nerves. That song never really hit the climactic moment. It just kind of fell flat for me for you. Steven Tyler: "You couldn't have picked a better song. It was just beautiful. You have a big heart. For that alone, you should be America's Idol." Jenny from the Block: "Jer-Bear! Some people are just blessed from God that when you open your mouth you affect people. When you open your mouth it's just music. The audience is going to see who you are." Randy Yo Dawg: "America, meet Jeremy. Jeremy, meet America. We got some sAngers on this show. I was so impressed with the big booming vocals. Dude, I love you man!" Why am I so underwhelmed??

Steven Tyler is officially high. Or intoxicated.

Aaron Marcellus teaches voice lessons and takes dance lessons. But he's a regular dude. Oh kay. In all reality, I do enjoy him. He's singing "Never Can Say Goodbye." So he's singing a goodbye song. That's a good move on week one. *sarcasm* Either I'm really tired or he is really sharp in his tone. Jenny from the Block is gettin' down with her bad self. I will say I enjoy this performance the most thus far. Even with the unnecessary scream at the end. He got a standing O from the judges. Randy Yo Dawg: "You're like a veteran walking around on the stage singing with ease. Great vocals." Jenny from the Block: "Randy said it before, boy can sang, that's the end of the story. But I'mma keep talking anyway because I like to hear myself talk." Steven Tyler: "We always talk about the whole package, that's what you had tonight." It was the best so far, but I don't know if I think it was fantastic.

Chase Likens is up next. He lives in an apartment. But he has horses. Where do they sleep?? He's singing a country song I've never heard by someone I've never heard of. So that will probably work out well. Jenny from the Block is chair dancing again. Why is this guy here? I mean it's fine. It's just mediocre and drab. There is nothing interesting about this performance. The judges all probably think he was amazing. Steven Tyler: "You look like Brendan Frasier. You're going to set a lot of hearts on fire, lots of Mommies at home." Me: "As a Mommy at home, I can say that this is false information." Jenny from the Block: "You're attractive...oh yeah and you sounded good." Randy Yo Dawg: "You have skills and range and you're handsome like me." Me: "Who cares what he looks like? Seriously."

Creighton Fraker is next. He was a preacher's kid. He didn't fit in there so he moved to New York. He's singing "True Colors." Girl song. Are there really no boy songs available? This is going to sound mean but he sounds exactly like Cyndi Lauper, who actually sings this song. Jenny from the Block: "That was so beautiful. I don't want you to go home. You showed dynamics. You're an individual." Steven Tyler: "Cyndi Lauper did a beautiful job of that. It was stupendous." Randy Yo Dawg: "Dude. You can definitely sing." Me: "Of course he can sing. At this point,they should all be able to "sing."" Ohhhh....Creighton's birth Dad is the 80's rocker. His bio Dad is a preacher. Or was a preacher. That explains a lot.

Phillip is next. I like him. He works at a pawn shop. Phillip doesn't want to be famous for fame he wants to be normal and to make great music. He is singing "In the Air Tonight," which I have never heard of. I like the tone of his voice. The rasp is really natural and pleasant. This competition is going to eat him up. This is pleasant enough, but he's obviously uncomfortable on stage. Jenny from the Block: "Last year we came back talking about Lauren Alaina and Scotty McReery. This year we were talking about Phillip Phillips." Me: "You were not talking about Scotty McReery. You were talking about James Durbin and you know it. Stop. Just stop." Steven Tyler: "You have an amazing talent." Randy Yo Dawg: "You know I wasn't jumping up and down about the reharm of that melody. You're so unique, you remind me of Dave Mathews." Me: "By definition, one cannot be both unique and remind you of someone else." Phillip Phillips Dad, Phillip Phillips is very proud of him. I would have voted for him if I had watched early enough.

Jebeneiber! He's a jokester. He goes to school and does chores. He's boring. He's singing "Set Fire to the Rain" which is an Adele song. Adele is a girl. But it's ok because Jebeneiber sounds kinda girly. Again, his voice sounds slightly under pitch. Maybe it's the sound? I don't know. But I don't enjoy this. Randy Yo Dawg: "You are so mad young. And so mad calm and cool and collected. It wasn't all perfect. There were some flat notes in the middle there." Me: "Ok. I'm not crazy." Jenny from the Block: "I felt the same way. But it impressed me that you held on." Steven Tyler: "You have a true, straight voice for someone so young. Listen to blues records." Jebeneiber's strategy is to take it one step at a time. What an intelligent strategy. Since there's not really another choice.

Heejun is up. I love Heejun. Heejun's Mom is adorable. I really like Heejun. He's singing "Angels." His voice is like velvet. That was a really good performance, actually. I would have voted for that. Jenny from the Block: "You're voice is smooth as silk. That song didn't show it off." Steven Tyler: "I don't think it was the right song but I still love your voice." Randy Yo Dawg: "I agree. You're mad talented." Me: "How was that not a good song choice? I thought it showed off his voice wonderfully. Stupid judges." Ryan and Heejun do the sweating bit again.

Joshua Ledet is up next. I'm so tired but I want to know who the 13th dude is. I like him. He is singing a song by Jennifer Hudson. I don't think anyone sang a boy song tonight. So dumb. His voice is fantastic. This performance is great. I really really like him. The judges do too. He's so understated. Randy Yo Dawg: "I love you. This is what singing is about. I love great voices." Jenny from the Block: "You are amazing. I don't know what to say to you. I want to punch you. Your voice is from God." Me: "What is your voice from Jenny from the Block?" Steven Tyler: "You are the voice the world has been waiting to hear. I could not believe where you went and came back again." It really was amazing.

The thirteenth dude is.......


I'm so happy!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE Jermaine!!!!!!!!!!!

He is going to sing "Dance with my Father." Classic Vandross. Good choice for him. Let's be real here, I really doubt Jermaine will win, just based simply on the fact that his voice is so specific that I don't see how he could have a lot of variety. For example, I don't see him being able to pull off a Beatles song let's say. Randy Yo Dawg: "That's why we wanted you on the show. You're so different and so unique." Me: "Uhhhh....when you eliminated him in the first place you said he was too unique Randy Yo Dawg. Which is it?" Jenny from the Block: "You have such a special spirit and such a special voice and I'm glad that America got to see you tonight." Steven Tyler: "Thank you for proving to us why we asked you to come back." Jermaine's Mom is very involved. Jermaine and his Mom are very attached.

Asterisks denote my top 5

Reed (guy with the drums)*
Adam (man with the black woman trapped inside)
DeAndre (boy with long hair)
Colton (boy that defiled the piano)
Jeremy (wild card selection) (nice kid)
Aaron (black kid with glasses)
Chase (country guy)
Creighton (Preacher's kid)*
Phillip (pawn shop)*
Jebeneiber (do you really need a descriptor for this one)
Heejun (Asian)*
Joshua (gospel guy)*
Jermaine (gentle giant)

Friday, February 24, 2012

Top 24 Revealed!

Here we go.

Adam Brock is in. And he's very, VERY emotional about it. Like, uncomfortably emotional. Also, three words he used to describe what he has to do in life. "I have to sing." Either that's fuzzy math or he's actually saying "I hafta sing."

Jeremy Rosado (the big young kid that Jenny from the Block said was a nice kid) should definitely be through. And he is. I'm happy about that. I like when they seem to be genuinely nice.

Shannon Magrane (the tall girl with baseball dad) will probably go through. I don't know. She may have overstayed her welcome. She has a pretty voice and is pretty (which shouldn't matter, but does), but I don't really see her being able to do a lot of variety. She's through. And she does some kind of crazy dance with all of her limbs.

Scott Dangerfield, who apparently auditioned last year and then pulled himself out. He was obviously not memorable this year because this is the first I've seen of him. He's not in this year and is kind of rude about it. "It is what it is." Well, of course it is what is. If it wasn't what it is, it wouldn't be what it is. Of course that depends on what your definition of "it" is.

Rejection pile.

Skylar Lane (the girl that reminds the judges of Reba) is up. I like her. She's not the best performer I've ever seen, but she seems to have a lot of potential. She's through. She'll be interesting to watch.

Hallie Day is in (the girl with white blonde hair)

Chase Likens (I have nothing distinguishing sorry) is in.

Aaron Marcellus (black guy with horn rim glasses) is in.

DeAndre Brackensick (the guy with looooooong blonde girly hair), he reminds me of Jason Castro. And Paul just said the same thing without having read what I typed. HA! DeAndre Makemesick is his new name. And he's in. Paul vetoes that name. We'll see.

Jermaine Jones (gentle giant) is awesome. He's so sweet and gentle and good-natured. His voice is unique, and perhaps too unique for Idol. Because Idol tends to spew out pop bubble-gum superstars. Minus Ms. Underwood of course. Randy tells him he's the most different artist they've had in a while, but he's too uniquely talented so he's going home. This has got to be the saddest elimination on American Idol. Jermaine is just so sad.

Ariel Sprague (little black girl), Shelby Tweeten (nondescript blonde), Hollie Cavanagh (girl with white blond hair). Incidentally, Hollie auditioned last year, cried her way into Hollywood and then got eliminated somewhere along the way. But no one is mentioning that. Strange. Out of those three, I would take Ariel. But the other two are fine too. Hollie is in. Cool. I guess.

The last two contestants are Eben (Justin Bieber's little brother) and David Leathers (the "17" year old kid). So either way Annoying will be in. Eben is in. His new name is Jebenieber.

So that's it.

Asterisks denote favorites

Adam Brock*
Phil Phillips*
Eben Francowitz
Joshua Ledet*
Reed Grimm*
Aaron Marcellus
Colton Dixon
Heejun Han
Chase Likens
Deandre Brackensick
Creighten Fraker
Jeremy Rosado*

Shannon Magrane*
Brielle Von Hugel
Jennifer Hirsch*
Hallie Day
Jessica Sanchez
Erika Van Pelt
Bailey Brown*
Chelsea Sorrel
Haley Johnson
Hollie Cavanaugh
Elise Testone*
Skylar Lane*

HAHAHA! Paul is doing his favorites and just paused on Creighton. He said, "I don't know anything about him, but I think he's going to win. He fits the profile." The profile: white guy with a guitar. I will say, the odds are against the girls winning. Again.

Oh good! They're going to add another guy back in to make a top 13. The choices are Jermaine, The Cowboy, Johnny Keyser, and David Leathers. My guess is it's actually between Jermaine and David. I for one will be praying that the Cowboy will never be heard from again.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

So I Skipped a Week...

I watched the actual group performances and the 50's week performances tonight. I was meh about most of them. There were a couple that stood out, but I was distracted by my crying child/other things.

I will say that I don't like Brielle (girl with the over-involved Mom).

Oh, and Jessica (the girl who's boyfriend had a stroke)should have stayed in longer. That was ridiculous.

Anyway, here we are at Final 24 cut time.

The judges appear to be sitting in a pool of water. It's like in Harry Potter when Dumbledore has to drink the stuff from the shell and those terrible monsters come up out of the water. I can't remember what it's called.

Jen Hirsch- the girl from The Lady and the Spectacles. I like her. She is very soulful and I enjoy her completely. She also sang "Georgia" in her solo round. And she got a standing ovation. Anyway, she should be in. Jenny from the Block looks like a mermaid. Jen Hirsch is in. I'm a fan.

Creighton Fraker is next. He was in Jen Hirsch's group. He's the one that said he was a starving artist from New York. He has grown on me. I think he's probably in. I'm right. Apparently he was adopted and discovered that his birth Dad was in an 80's rock band.

Lauren Gray is up next. I love her and I think she should make it. She plays in the bar with her Dad. WHAT. She did not make it. Tragic. She was great.

Joshua Ledet (black guy who I had never seen before group week, preacher's kid). Goodness, there appears to be a pirate ship behind him while he sings his final song. I like his voice a LOT. I want him to make it. You know what I hate? I hate when Randy Jackson, or any of the judges for that matter, go on and on about how hard this week is and they hate to say goodbye to so many great people. Just hush. Joshua made it. HAHA! He straight up busted into some gospel praise music! Awesome!

And here come the rejects.

Haley Johnson is mediocre at best. I don't have anything distinguishing to say about her. She's blonde. Oh, wait, she was in the group that did "The Night has a Thousand Eyes" in the Vegas performance challenge. The one that sang the last riff. I don't know, I don't think she's any better than any of the other contestants. She made it.

Nico (the kid with the jerrycurl) is out. I'm fine with that.

Elise Testone (another blonde with a really soulful, great voice) is in. I'm fine with that as well.

Reed Grimm (the guy who played drums and sang) is in. I'm 100% fine and TOTALLY for that.

Erika Van Pelt, the blonde girl with the red in her hair. Really soulful voice. I like her and I want her to make it. Apparently she had a rough time with her final song yesterday. Erika is through. Yay.

Chelsea is another contestant that I don't remember ever seeing. She missed lyrics. She should be out. But she's not out, which is tragic. She's cute and has bouncy hair, but I don't know if her voice is actually worth a spot in the top 24.

Bailey Brown is awesome. I like her a lot. I think she has a really good shot. But she decided to sing a goodbye song as her final song. So odds are she's done. What a waste. Hey! She made it! Hooray!

Richie the Cowboy is up. I really hope he goes away. He sang "Ring of Fire" as his final song. Please go away. Please. I can't take it if another talentless kid in a cowboy hat wins American Idol. I'm lookin' at you Scotty. Hallelujah. The cowboy kid is done.

Heejun and Jermaine (the dude he sang a duet with) were very happy.


This just happened.

Ryan: Heejun you said you're sweating.

Heejun: Yeah.

Ryan: What are you sweating?

Heejun:.... Mostly water.

Ryan: I mean about the competition.

Heejun: Oh, oh yeah....of course.

That was priceless. I'm hoping Heejun was just being funny. I think he was. My question is, why is he sweating MOSTLY water? Is he also sweating some other substance? Yikes.

Heejun should make it. He does.

Jessica Sanchez. I had never seen her before Vegas. She sang "Natural Woman" in San Diego apparently. And she sang with the guy with the reallllllly long blonde curly hair. She kind of reminds me of the little Asian girl from last season that I just loved (sarcasm). Tia? Was that her name? I don't know. But Jessica bores me. And Jessica's should never be boring. She's through.

Phil Phillips (the pawn guy). I love him. He's a really amazing musician. Kind of like Reed Grimm. But slightly less crazy. And Phil is very laid back, which I enjoy. I want him to make it, obviously. He did. I win.

Colton Dixon (the kid who's sister didn't make it with him). By the way, I don't buy that he was "not going to audition." He seems to be just fine being on the show now. He's a little over the top for me for you. I have a bad feeling about him. Like he's going to annoy me. Greatly.This is where Colton was kicked off last year. He made it this time. My bad feeling has gotten worse already.

Brielle and her Mom need to get gone. Brielle reminds me of Hayley from last season. And we all know how I felt about her and her poo squat. She's through. Oh good.

Adam Brock (the dude with the little baby girl). He should make it. But I won't know whether he does or not until I watch the next episode. Which I will not be doing this evening.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Group Round...DundunDUN...

The dreaded Group Round is here. Friends are made. Enemies are made. And some of the most outrageously horrible group performances will take place. All in the hopes of finding the next white guy who plays a guitar and sings at least sort of decently.

Symone fell off the stage. Her fellow contestants prayed. She ate and went to the hospital. And we're moving on.

The special needs teacher, the guy who needs a band-aid and the big guy that I had never heard before are all in Symone's group. Symone got a yes. Duh. Lauren (special ed teacher), Ethan (guy who needed a band-aid, with the rehab Dad) are out. The big dude is in.

185 people made it past the first round of Hollywood week. WAYYYYY too many.

Group round is happening. Groups must have 4-5 people and be mixed with Day 1 and Day 2. The girl who lives in a tent can't find a group. But Ryan says she can't find a home. Very nice Ryan. Very nice. And she's sick. She wants fresh air. Girl, you're in Hollywood, there is no fresh air.

The cop is very lame.

Heejun (the Asian), Phillip (pawn shop), and Jairon (I have no descriptor for him) found one more person.

The cop is very lame. I already said that. The tent girl and 3 other people are going to sing "More than a Feeling." The cop has been ditched.

A girl who sang with Pia in groups last year, the tall 15 year old, and a guy with curly hair from San Diego. Brielle (the one from Pia's group) is bossy. She has her Mom with her (who is also bossy). Her Mom thinks the weakest voice is opening the song. The person opening the song is the kid from SD that Steven said was the best male voice they heard in that audition round. So clearly, Brielle's non-stage Mom knows exactly what she's talking about. Toddlers and Tiaras, anyone?

Symone is back. She was dehydrated. She needs to find a group. Symone's Dad is making sure she finds a group. Symone just wants her Dad to calm down. So do I. Symone's Dad is kind of creepy.

The tent girl's group is doing ok. Tent girl has not keeled over or puked yet.

Richie the Cowboy is in the group with the Pawn Star, The Asian, and The Non-Descript Black Guy are not meshing well.

The group with the girl cop is very bad.

Tent Girl thinks the devil is trying to get her sick. But she has Jesus on her team. I'm so glad she brought Jesus into this.

The Asian is hilarious. "Phillip had a kidney stone, The Cowboy Kid had a brain stone...I don't know what's goin' on with him." "I have a very, very bad perspective towards Cowboys....even Dallas Cowboys...freakin' Cowboys."

Everyone is exhausted. Gabrielle the girl with curly hair is sick. Everyone but Jennifer (the one who cried) is mad.

The Betty's (the group with the girl who cried) is up first. AND that's all. Actual performances will be next week, apparently.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Hollywood *BARF* Week

Apparently this is the most intense Hollywood Week ever. Which is strange because they said that last year too. But there's ambulances, vomit, and fainting (oh my!) involved so they could be right this time.

309 people are coming to Hollywood Week. Everyone is excited to be in California.

Steven Tyler is like a hybrid of Shel Silverstein and Dr. Seuss. Which is a little disturbing.

Johnny Keyser is up in the first group of Hollywood week people. The Asian Guy is also up. Johnny will stay. I'm ambivalent about Asian guy. Johnny sings "Dreamin'" and it's good. He has nice control and nice range. Randy thinks he's in church. It's pretty obvious that Johnny is staying. The Asian Guy has ZERO confidence in himself. So he's not going to do well. His name is Heejun not Asian Guy. He's singing "How Am I Supposed to Live Without You." OH yeah, I remember this guy. I like him. I would like him to stay. Ryan is cryptically whispering and telling us that 1/2 of the contestants will be going home today.

Johnny, Heejun, and 2 girls are in. Everyone else is out.

Elise is up. I don't know if I remember her. Vaguely. Baylie Brown from the restaurant in Texas is up. She should stay. Steven appears to agree. Halle Day (still don't believe that's her real name) is up. She is very forced. I don't enjoy her. She's singing "Natural Woman." Elise, Baylie, and Halle are all in. With other people that don't matter.

Jen Hirsh is up. I think I remember her too. But I'm not 100%. No. I don't. But I like her a lot. Lauren Gray got so caught up in her song that she didn't want to stop. Jen and Lauren are both in.

A bunch of girls totally crashed and burned. Maybe you should put people through on their VOICES not how they LOOK (this is directed primarily at Randy Yo Dawg and Steven Tyler. And Nigel Lythgoe because we all know he has a say in these matters as well).

Steven is giving a pep talk.

Phil Philips (pawn store guy) is up. I think he'll make it. Uh-oh. He's turned into Paul McDonald. Reed Grimm is up. I also remember him. He does some scatting and it's a'ight for me for you. The judges (Jenny in particular) do not seem amused. Travis Orlando (from last season) is up also. He has vastly improved, at least from what I remember of him last season. Philip and Reed are in. Travis is out. Again. Wow. I would have kept him. That's really unfortunate.

Ramiro is out (the worship leader). Wolf is out (the guy that looks like Zac Brown). Jenny Schick (the girl that kissed Steven Tyler on the mouth) is out.

Day 2 of Hollywood Week.

Adam Brock is someone that they did not show us his original audition. Because I would remember him. He's great. He kind of reminds me of Danny Gokey. Jane Carrey is up. Jim Carrey's kid. She's singing "Lookin' Out My Back Door." I liked it. So did Paul. I want her to go through. WHAT? That's LAME. Adam is through, which I enjoy. But Jane should have made it. Jim Carrey tells her he got rejected a lot and it worked out well for him. Alllllllllrighty then....get it?

Some people don't know what no means. It's ridiculous.

Astro is up. Oh, wait, I mean David Leathers who is "17." Shannon is also in this group. I love her....oh wait...she's singing "Fallin'" Ohhhhhhhverdone. David is singing now. He's singing "Because You Love Me." By Celine Dion. He's a boy. Celine is a woman. A) This kid is not 17. B) He sounds just like Michael Jackson. Jessica Philips is up. I liked her in her audition. I like her a lot. I got chills twice. She needs to stay in. Shannon, David, and Jessica are all in.

The NBA cheerleader is in. I'm sure she has a whole lot of vocal talent.

Erika Van Pelt! I liked her. I forgot about some of these people. Mommy brain has taken over. Creighton Fraker, this guy creeps me out. He looks like he should be a villain in a Spiderman movie. Aaron Marcellus, I do not remember him. And I'm ok with that. I find him over the top. All three are in.

Lauren Mink is the director for a program for adults with disabilities. So I'm a fan. She changed keys in the middle of her song. Jeremy Risotto is singing "Superstar." Which is by Luther Vandross. Which I learned yesterday from American Idol. See? Educational. This guy is a little bit annoying.

Simone is from Rancho Cucamonga. Holla! Her Dad is a stage Dad. She has a lovely voice. ANNNNND she fell off the stage. Oh no! To be continued....